I like my face, I like my feet, I somewhat like my hands (when it's cold they tend to have the appearance of an elderly lady), but I pretty much hate everything else.
Because of stress I've been slowly expanding since around March. I stopped exercising regularly and began eating a lot more. Given, I don't think I've gained that much weight. But it's what I've lost that's bugging me: muscle tone (but that's not what this post is about) and my good body image.
Honestly, I remember the days when I didn't care about going out in a bikini when I was on vacation, when I would wear whatever the hell I wanted because I could...but now I see myself as this blob and that is totally not the case! Consciously, I know that I'm considered thin. But subconsciously, there's this nagging. I'm at a good weight for my body, really healthy actually, but I don't feel it.
I started thinking about this less than half an hour ago when I put on this new shirt I bought, lifted my arms, and the button at my chest popped open. Just undid itself! Can I just say how friggin' useless breasts are to a childless teenager? I remember when I got comfortable at a B-cup and thought it was over but then fast-forward a year an a half and I'm at a D! (Okay, you probably didn't want to hear this, but I'm venting.)
I'll probably continue on this thought later, when I can come to some conclusions.
Right now I'm too busy having unhealthy thoughts and feeling guilty for the junk food I ate not long ago.
And how sore I am from the intense workouts I've been doing these past two days.
And how pissed I am at my mother for commenting on the amount of time I'm on the computer, which just makes me feel so much worst.
This is terrible.
You can go back to your life now.
Kiah
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