No matter what's going on, things will ultimately eventually get better. It might take a while, but they will change. Either that, or you'll get used to them, and things won't be so shitty anymore.
This year off that I'm taking is getting to me. It depresses me to the point that I'm not sure I can go on. I have nine months left of this, and I'm not sure I can even survive one.
I know I hold high expectations for myself. Since grade nine I expected, at this point, to be off at university, far away from my family and making new friends that maybe had a few more interests in common with me. Of course that's not the case. Of course I'm stuck in "The Bubble" with no way out but university, which is something I'll firstly have to wait for, and something I'll secondly have to try and afford.
I guess the stress is getting to me. And that stress is turning into anxiety. And that anxiety turns into depression.
I just need to remind myself to live. To keep dreaming. To keep hoping. Because nothing lasts forever.
This post was more for my personal benefit than the sharing of my own insights.
Unfortunately, this is something I'll never come to terms with. I'm too fucked up for that.
You can go back to your life now.
Kiah
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